Friday, October 14, 2011

Should Be, Could Be


I should be working on the second book in my current series. Yet, despite this knowledge, I’m not writing. In fact, I haven’t written for a while. Part of the reason is I have a two-year-old, watch my sister’s 3 kids (9, 6 and 3), then there’s my three dogs and we currently have 9 puppies. The puppies go to their new homes soon, so that should free up a lot of time. Right now, though, I really could be writing.

Haha. I guess I am, when I think about it. Blogging is writing, right?

This is, unfortunately, just a procrastinating event, however. The truth is, I’m stuck at this very moment because I turned in the first book two days ago. It’s always the hardest part of the process. Writing takes a long time. Editing is not my favorite part, but I’m getting better at it the older I get. Being patient while my small circle of reviewers take their time to read it twice just sucks. But turning it in ... letting someone who matters to whether it stays a forever-draft or turns into a printed work ... that is hard.

Silly, really. I’ll keep writing either way. Then again, how can I write number two when I’m obsessing over number one?

I would guess sending off a manuscript is a lot like sending your kids off to school. The first time you do it is agonizing, and each time somehow gets a little easier, but you still have that heart-wrenching feeling as your baby goes off to grow up. Granted, my baby is only two and I suspect Kindergarten may prove a bit more of a challenge, but at the moment, that’s my great analogy.

This particular attempt at becoming published is different from all my other ones, though. When I had tried before, I always started researching the publishing companies, seeing which ones were accepting submissions without agents. I’ve had two agents in my past and neither one was what they should have been - but then, I wasn’t as smart about this process as before, either. Good agents are out there, I was just never informed enough to be able to find them.

So I tried to get published without an agent for a few years. Every time I got my rejection letters, I didn’t feel rejected. I honestly just felt like there were too many fish in my sea. I just didn’t know how to get out of the masses to distinguish myself. There are many different long-term plans to get there, I just couldn’t dedicate myself to many of them because they didn’t seem right for me.

This time, my husband came to the rescue. He believes in me maybe even more than I believe in myself. He found a smaller publisher branching out into new areas of publishing and looking for new authors. He showed them my prologue and they agreed to read the rest of my book. So off it went, and here I am, waiting to see how my baby’s first day of school was, putting off writing the next book until I know.